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not able to cope

Old Jul 22, 2004 | 11:15 PM
  #1  
smokie700's Avatar
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From: Ewa Beach, Hawaii
Unhappy not able to cope

I've been through breakups before but now im going through something much worse. My wife cheated on me and is now living with the guy. I've been going crazy. I can't eat,sleep or stop thinking about her. I know i should move on but then I'll be giving up on us. The reason why im holding on is cuz sh's been on some drugs lately and not acting like herself. I think she is at a growing phase in her life and isn't able to deal with it.
the problem is she is 22 and im 27 so i think the age difference is a cause but not a major one. I hate life right now. I know one i'll look back and say why did i act like a little p**sy. But right now i can't think of anything else.

Sorry for the ramble i needed to vent a little.
Old Jul 23, 2004 | 12:54 AM
  #2  
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Re: not able to cope

Originally posted by smokie700
I've been through breakups before but now im going through something much worse. My wife cheated on me and is now living with the guy. I've been going crazy. I can't eat,sleep or stop thinking about her. I know i should move on but then I'll be giving up on us. The reason why im holding on is cuz sh's been on some drugs lately and not acting like herself. I think she is at a growing phase in her life and isn't able to deal with it.
the problem is she is 22 and im 27 so i think the age difference is a cause but not a major one. I hate life right now. I know one i'll look back and say why did i act like a little p**sy. But right now i can't think of anything else.

Sorry for the ramble i needed to vent a little.
Sorry to hear that man... but dude life goes on. If you decide to move forward with life, you're not the one giving up - she already gave up on the relationship by cheating on you. I've been through a couple bad breakups myself (not marriage, but they were just about there) and it hurts for anywhere from weeks to months to even years, but if you stick with trying to get her back or waiting for her to come back, you're not moving forward in flife - you're putting yourself in a position where you've put life in "pause" mode. All the while your girl, that dude, me, my neighbors dog, and the rest of the world are still moving forward with life. Before you know it you'll fond someone better, more faithful, and she'll make you happy again - then you'll realize that you put your life on "pause" for nothing.
Old Jul 23, 2004 | 12:56 AM
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very well put, thanks
Old Jul 23, 2004 | 01:18 AM
  #4  
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Originally posted by smokie700
very well put, thanks
Oh, and to try to cheer you up a little...

... now spend all your free time working on your car. It can be better than a girl:

It doesn't ***** at you.
It only needs a bath once a week to look pretty.
You can ride it whenever you want.
you can have 3 different girls on her in a week and she won't say a thing.
Won't bug you whenever you go buy car stuffs.
Is fine sleeping outside.
Will sing whatever song you want... just burn it on a CD.
Loves mountain roads.
Hates Hondas.
No matter how much you poke it, it won't get pregnant.
Its in-laws are the "GT-R" and the "Fairlady".

Old Jul 23, 2004 | 02:09 AM
  #5  
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From: Harrisburg, PA
Originally posted by l2aine
Oh, and to try to cheer you up a little...

... now spend all your free time working on your car. It can be better than a girl:

It doesn't ***** at you.
It only needs a bath once a week to look pretty.
You can ride it whenever you want.
you can have 3 different girls on her in a week and she won't say a thing.
Won't bug you whenever you go buy car stuffs.
Is fine sleeping outside.
Will sing whatever song you want... just burn it on a CD.
Loves mountain roads.
Hates Hondas.
No matter how much you poke it, it won't get pregnant.
Its in-laws are the "GT-R" and the "Fairlady".

thats some good ****
Old Jul 23, 2004 | 02:50 AM
  #6  
l2aine's Avatar
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Originally posted by s13 240
thats some good ****
thanks... just made it all up as I was typing it
Old Jul 23, 2004 | 03:13 PM
  #7  
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From: AUSTIN BABY
i dont know. it kinda depends on you. if i were married i'd NEVER give up...reguardless of her cheating on me. reguardless of her living with someone else.

you dont ever really have to move on, u just kinda become numb to the pain


also the drugs may be affecting her judgement.
Old Jul 23, 2004 | 04:22 PM
  #8  
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you know i feel the same way leif, I don't think i'll ever give up but i wonder if she will push me to the point of not caring anymore. I'll never get completely over her. as far as the drugs go the guy she's with is a dealer and is about to get busted by vice and i don't want her to get cought up in the mess.
Old Jul 23, 2004 | 05:15 PM
  #9  
l2aine's Avatar
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From: Socal, 909/626
Originally posted by smokie700
you know i feel the same way leif, I don't think i'll ever give up but i wonder if she will push me to the point of not caring anymore. I'll never get completely over her. as far as the drugs go the guy she's with is a dealer and is about to get busted by vice and i don't want her to get cought up in the mess.
I dunno man... realistically she chose the position she's in, not you. She has her own mind and if she gets caught up in the mess, it was because of her own choices and decisions. you can try to talk to her and see if you can persuade her to get out before it gets bad, but in the end, no matter how much talking you or anyone else does to her, or how much advice she gets, bottom line is that it's her decision what she'll want to do.

Same with you. We can suggest things or tell you to stick with it or not, but in the end it's the same thing - your life, your mind, your heart, your decision as to what you do.

Like I said, the easy way out is to let go... but it might take a long, long time to get completely over her (eventually you will). The hard way is to try to make it work, but you gamble with that choice because there's no guarantee you'll get her back.

Either way there's going to be a lot of effort involved because of the situation you're in, but if you keep a strong will and an attentive mind you can do anything, bro
Old Jul 23, 2004 | 09:16 PM
  #10  
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From: Johnson City, TN
Sorry to hear about that. Hang in there.
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